The Girl He Misses
by girlintheTARDIS
Summary: The Doctor returns to see her, his pink and yellow human, his Rose. She's just a little girl who dreams of the stars, a little girl who doesn't know him yet. But oh he knows her, more than she probably knows herself. He finally decides to tell Amy about his former companion, the girl he loved and lost. Rose isn't just a girl who you hear about though, you have to meet her.


**I do not own Doctor Who. If I did I wouldn't be writing stories involving the characters and I'd be living in England. I wish I owned even a sonic, but alas I don't. This takes place before Asylum of the Daleks, just fyi. So between Seasons 6 and 7.  
**

It wasn't easy worrying for a man whom you never knew was going to just drop back into your life when it suited him best. After what seemed like a lifetime in the Tardis, Amy didn't like living the slow path anymore. Every night as she crawled into bed she wished he would come and rescue her again, take her away to live among the stars where she could try and forget the hurt that coursed through her. She knew there was a time where she was alone, but then the cracks in the skin of the universe had closed and the holes of her life had been filled; now she felt more alone than ever. It was almost expected for Rory to walk through the door, kiss her on the cheek, wraps his arms around her and say everything was going to be okay.

She then jumped at the sound of the door opening her heart caught in her chest, only to have it fall slightly when she heard the Doctor's voice. "Ponds, I'm home!" he yelled as he struts into the room. Usually the Doctor wasn't very good with upset women; he didn't know what to do when they cried or how they even could produce mass quantities of tears. It was like a foreign language to him. His smile faltered slightly when he took notice to the broken look upon her face. "Are you alright, Amy?"

She nodded, not wanting to bother the Doctor with her troubles; and it wasn't as if this was something that could just magically be fixed either. "Just miss Rory," she started carefully. "He's out of town for something and I miss him." An easy enough lie even though she was silently suffering.

"Come along, Pond. I have someone you should meet."

After minutes in the Tardis they had landed and were out the doors in an instant. Amy noted that the Doctor had a certain spark in his eyes, acting in a way she'd never seen him behave. He seemed happier. It brought a smile to her face to know her Raggedy Doctor was happy, but she also wondered what had brought it on. He was ahead of her, walking from where the Tardis had landed to a large open field. She picked out a small figure, sitting in the grass with her neck tilted upwards as she gazed at the stars.

"I told you I'd be back, was gone only five minutes!"

Amy scoffed a bit, "So you're only gone five minutes for her?" She scowled a bit, crossing her arms and wondering why he could return after minutes for the little girl but she had to wait years and years for him to come back for her. Though she wouldn't admit it, Amy was easily jealous when it came to the Doctor. He was her best friend, and she hoped that somewhere he thought the same about her.

"Amelia Pond, meet Rose Tyler." Amy looked down to see a young girl, perhaps only five years old, before looking back to the Doctor to find him smiling down at the blonde. He loved the way her name just rolled off his tongue, surely not as well as it did in his previous self but he believed no matter what face he wore her name would always taste the same on his lips. "Love the name, could say it all day! _Rose_ Tyler," he stressed out syllables and gave a short laugh as he sat down next to the small blonde girl.

"It felt like forever," she pointed out and of course as she was just a child it had felt so much longer.

The Doctor looked to the inside of his wrist, at his watch before he touched his pointer finger to her nose, "I was only gone four and a half minutes, and there's a rule that you should always wait four and a half hours for me." It might have been a little hint; something to key her in later that he didn't just forget her but instead stopped back in on her just for the sake of seeing her, something so she knew that he still cared. He hoped she remembered this someday, wherever she was and just smile that smile that made his hearts melt. Amy was still confused, but she sat down next to the Doctor as she continued to watch the little girl, Rose.

Rose leaned forward and looked at the redhead, "Are you a teacher too?" she asked pointedly.

"Met me at her school. I helped her with her homework," he whispered quietly to Amy. "Mr. Smith, I'm called. Bit rubbish, but that's besides the point."

Still with no idea what was going on, Amy shook her head a little. "Just a friend, that's all. But who are you?" she asked, wanting desperately to know why the Doctor brought her here.

"Rose here is my friend, needed some help with her homework and so I helped her—"

"—You gave me the answers, that's not helping." Amy laughed at the little girl's response, while the Doctor merely glanced to the blonde with a smile to his face. "But you did teach me 'bout the stars, I like those."

Maybe that was it? The Doctor popped in for something and ended up meeting a girl who dreamed about the stars. To Amy it seemed like he had a thing for little girls who wanted to touch the stars, but why was she so special? But she didn't know the truth. The Doctor rarely talked about his previous companions. Amy had once found a photograph in his jacket pocket of a blonde, which he refused to talk about before snatching the picture from her and tucking it away within his pocket; maybe this was her daughter?

"You'll see the stars someday. I promise," he said looking to her, amusement to his face as she smiled with a glow that reached her eyes. "Places so pretty you couldn't even imagine, Rose Tyler, and you'll get to see it all."

The three remained there for a while, losing track of the time as they lay on their backs just watching the night sky while the Doctor had pointed out constellations and star clusters. Amy could even swear that she saw him holding the little girl's hand. Rose had jumped up when she heard her name being yelled from the distance. She stood up, dusting off herself and picking some grass off her jacket. "That's mum, and it's time to go home. Will you be back here again ever? I wanna learn more 'bout the stars and stuff."

After the Doctor stood up, he messed with her hair before he leaned down to catch her eye. "I'll always be here for you, Rose Tyler. Forever." Rose smiled and jumped forward to hug him quickly before she pulled away and ran as Jackie called her name again.

The walk back was a quiet one, he looked back every so often just to see if he could see her. Once they were back on the Tardis, the Doctor had perched himself in the seat near the console with an obvious change in his demeanor. The smile on his face has grown smaller and he fiddled with his fingers in an almost nervous way. Amy took a few steps until she was standing in front of him and crossed her arms over her chest. "Doctor, who was that?" she asked, hoping that just this once he would actually tell her. Everyone knew he had his secrets, the things he never talked about, the same things no one asked about. She moved to sit beside him. The redhead reached over and took his hand before she offered him a small encouraging smile.

"She was a companion, or from her view she will be." Amy hadn't heard any stories of any of his former companions, but she knew they mean so much to him still. She remained quiet as he paused, almost as if he were searching for the correct words to say. "I… In my previous regeneration, well ninth— had funny ears, me." He made a motion of touching at his ears with a small smirk. "That's when I met her. I was a bit mean, made that way from the Time War, broken and on my own with barely anything that could be considered good in me. You wouldn't even recognize me Pond, and sometimes I needed someone to tell me when to stop being so thick. I met Rose, all pink and yellow, and she made me better." The Time Lord let out a great laugh before jumping up from his seat, pointing to his companion and then clapping his hands together. "She once stood between me and a Dalek, stopped me from killing it with his big ol' gun." She found it hard to imagine him that way, but she could only believe him because she wouldn't know. "Used to not mind weapons and all that, what in Rassilon was I thinking?" he mumbled to himself with a short laugh.

"Why'd she stop you from killing a Dalek?" asked Amy with bewilderment. She knew of Daleks, how cruel and cold they really were, and to think anyone would try to save one… At that moment she thought of this Rose a little mad for doing such a thing.

The Doctor laughed a bit, "Everything she did was so very human. We came across a Dalek, just one little Dalek and it was broken. The very last at the time, and she was so very kind, even to something that didn't deserve it. She touched the Dalek, it extrapolated her DNA and restored itself but that wasn't all it got. It got her emotions too, and it started questioning itself. In the end, the Dalek just wanted to feel the sunlight. I wanted to kill it but Rose said no." Amy listened, suddenly understanding why the Doctor seemed to admire her so much, and she began to realize just how she changed him.

"You loved her, didn't you?"

A laugh fell from his lips, a tender hand splayed across the console. Even by his movements she could tell he did. Why else would he be here, or have brought Amy to meet the little blonde girl who wanted to touch the stars. "I go and see her from time to time when I can, just enough for me and enough so she wouldn't think too much to put it all together when she actually meets me." Clever change of the subject, but Amy still noticed he didn't answer her question.

Amy stood up and skipped a ways around the console, "Why don't you just go and see her now? Like after you two stopped traveling together… I mean you still come see me and Rory." Then there it was, the thought of Rory that she'd been avoiding. For some reason she wanted to just be with him more than ever. But by his change in demeanor she thought that perhaps he couldn't visit Rose anymore for some reason. It made her thoughts and actions seem so petty. A man who deserved love more than anyone couldn't see the woman he loved and here she was so adamant to push Rory away, justifying it with thoughts that he'd be happier with someone else, with a family.

Then there it was. The certain darkness arose in his eyes and his features softened ever so slightly. "I can't, or I would. But she's lost, well not exactly lost but I can't see her again in her proper time. Well I'm brilliant, of course I could, but then two universes would implode, or explode, I don't know the details. I'd be lying if I said I didn't look into it."

Something in his eyes fell away. Was it the happiness he's shown before or something more than that? He still felt the guilt, even though something in him argued that he shouldn't, that Rose was there happy with his duplicate. But he still felt guilty for leaving her, the fact that it wasn't _him_ there beside her and holding her hand. Even still after the time that had passed, he didn't like talking about it for the sole reason that it caused him to miss her. He missed each his companions, but he could always pop in and see them if he so wished. But he never did, only because it felt wrong to be able to see them but not be able to see Rose. It was selfish, he knew that, but it hurt too much. He then looked up to Amy, mouth parting a ways in awe to find her with tears in her eyes. "Amy, why are you crying?" he asked as he took a few steps nearer to her.

Amy Pond didn't normally cry. She liked to believe she was tougher than most girls. Having gone through what she did, it was a bit hard to remember that it was actually alright to let emotions get the better of you every once in a while. The mere thought was agonizing. She'd been apart from Rory for not even a month and it felt like someone had brutally wounded her, then to imagine that she couldn't ever see him again made it hard to breathe. Tears pricked at her eyes for the Doctor, for her Raggedy Doctor. She saw now that behind the childish behavior, underneath the ancient eyes, he was so human; she couldn't remember a time that he seemed so vulnerable, not like this with his hearts out in the open for the girl he'd lost. Without even thinking, she leaped forward and wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug. "I'm so sorry, Doctor." Her voice was a whisper; a whisper that caused him to close his eyes shut tight and bury his face in her shoulder. "I'd do anything for her to be here with you," she told him truthfully. If there was anyone in the whole universe who deserved to be loved, Amy knew it was him.

"I'd do anything to see her again," he responded quietly, his voice so broken that it gave Amy chills. She could have sworn that he wiped his eyes as he pulled away from her, quickly turning towards the console to find a comfortable solitude. "Right, I should get you home then Pond."


End file.
